One of the most talked about issues in children’s ministry is Children’s Worship. As I lead conferences around the country I am hear, “What do you think our church should do? Should we provide children’s worship? Some people want it, some people don’t. Just tell us what to do.” My response has become, why do you think you should provide children’s worship and what are the benefits to? What are the benefits to children being in an intergenerational worship service?” I challenge people to list all of the benefits and negative aspects of both (children’s worship/intergenerational worship) and then make the decision.
Here are some advantages and disadvantages I have discovered relating to where children worship.
Advantages of intergenerational worship for adults:
- · Generations interact and get to know each other
- · Healthier church when all ages worship together
- · Children need to see the “family” worship together
- · Children are taught/mentored how to worship
- · Everyone experiences the same event and hears the same message
- · Congregation sees the children grow
- · Holistic feel to the life cycle of the church
- · Adults set examples for children
- · Kids add energy and enthusiasm to the worship service.
- · Adults learn from children
Advantages of intergenerational worship for children:
- · Children learn by watching parents and other adults
- · Learn to behave in church/serf-control
- · Exposure to all generations
- · Learn to worship
- · Spend time with family
- · Encourages children to participate with others
- · Develops memories of family worship
- · Children are included as part of the church body
Disdvantages of intergenerational worship for adults:
- · Distracted
- · Frustration/annoyed by children
- · Do not enjoy children and would like to not have them in the service
- · Lack of space for adults
Disadvantages of intergenerational worship for children:
- · Sermons are over their heads/do not understand
- · Boredom
- · Too long to sit without interaction
- · Not age-appropriate
- · Children do not list or pay attention
- · Topics do not pertain to their lives
- · Negative attitudes toward worship are formed
- · Misunderstand terminology and theology
Advantages of children’s worship for adults:
- · Less distractions
- · Pastor can address subjects not suitable for children
- · Better able to focus on worship
- · More space for adults
- · More visitor friendly
Advantages of children’s worship for children:
- · Age-appropriate worship
- · Better meets the spiritual needs of children
- · Less structure and more entertaining worship/FUN
- · Movement is allowed
- · Children enjoy church more
- · Allows for children’s diverse learning styles
- · Children get the full attention of the leaders
Finding the answer to where children should worship is not easy. The answer must be based on your church, your pastor’s philosophy of children, and the goal of worship. My challenge is to ensure children are provided times of worship whether in a separate children’s worship service, or in intergenerational services.
So what do you think? Post your comments (pro and con) for where children should worship.
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Today on the Lifeway VBS blog, meet our Geek of the Week, Megan Thomas!
Thanks for the insights and perspectives!
As a child, we attended church every time the doors were open. Children’s church was available through 3rd grade, and I loved it (still do, and I’m a grandmother, LOL) Once in 4th grade, I HATED church, once the song portion was over. I counted all the stained glass windows, the cracks in the ceiling, the chairs in the auditorium, drew pictures, played tic-tac-toe or the dot game (where you draw lines between the dots on a grid & put your initial in when you complete a square) with the kid next to me, wrote notes, to-do lists,etc. It was torture trying to sit still and keep quiet. I have noticed that many children quit attending around the same age, if their parents allowed them the choice. {My earliest memory of church services is of my mother glaring at me from the piano bench because I was whispering too loud, and my wishing I could take a nap like the old men in the back of the church.]
As an adult, the worship service is NOT a time of interaction with others (that is done in small group Bible studies, pot luck meals, game nights, etc.) It is a time when we are led to worship God and reflect on our personal relationship with God, not to chit chat with the person sitting next to us. Unless your service is different then the churches I have been in, our attention is on the worship team/leader, pastor/speaker, and NOT on each other. I must add, that many adults would not appreciate being forced to attend a weekly meeting geared to children, any more then children enjoy meetings that are adult appropriate.
As soon as my own children aged out of the nursery, I began leading Children’s Church, because I wanted my children to learn to LOVE coming to church, LOVE learning about God, LOVE worship, and WANT to invite their friends.
Children should NOT, however, be banned from adult worship, however. Parents should have a choice and make the decision about what is best for their child. My church offers children’s worship through 5th grade. Middle school begins in 6th grade for most schools here.
I teach kids because God I can’t not teach kids. I have a passion for them. I want children to ENJOY worship. John 4:23 says we should worship in spirit and in truth, and that is what I seek for children. We need to teach kids where they are now. Deuteronomy 6:5-7 tells us to teach our children about the love of God and his commandments.
I am a stay-at-home grandma of 4. While my children and their spouses work, I care for their kids M-F because I WANT to.
My church has been struggling with children’s worship for a few years now. I don’t think we’ve had much idea of how to hold it, what all it should entail, etc. So I’m incredibly grateful that you wrote this blog post. It gives a great rundown of children’s worship, and I plan on sharing it with my pastor immediately.
Nice one! I will share some of your ideas and info to my colleagues… hope it’s fine! =)