Adoption-Friendly Kids Ministry

There are several things in life that I am passionate about. I love God. I love serving Him. I love my family. Getting to be a husband and a father is one of the most amazing experiences of my life. I also love adoption. I love every aspect. I think that it is a beautiful picture of God’s love.

My experience with adoption is more personal than professional. I am the proud father of 4 sons, whom my wife and I adopted from Taiwan. However, in the past few years, I have found myself looking at adoption from the professional side. I want to make sure that churches are developing Kids Ministries where adoptive children and parents feel welcomed.

When we first adopted Reed in 2007, our church was very supportive of our family. One of Reed’s first Sunday School teachers was Mr. Robert (who coincindentally is husband of Reed’s kindergarten teacher this year, Mrs. Sarah). The church welcomed Reed with open arms and it really made us feel good about leaving him in loving arms.

Here are a few tips for making your kids ministry {more} adoption friendly:

• Offer to help with a fundraising project to support a family who is going through an adoption. Adoption expenses are very high, so many adoptive families choose fundraisers. This is a tremendous way to tell adoptive families that your church loves kids. There are many churches that offer a matching grant for families that are going through adoptions. Wow! I think that would be an awesome indicator of support. Go to LifeSong for Orphans for more information on how your church can assist families financially with their adoptions.
• Treat the new parents as you would any new parents. Some couples choose to adopt older children and the idea of hosting a baby shower might not seem necessary. Make sure that you do anything for an adoptive couple that you would for a couple who is having a biological child.
• Celebrity status isn\’t necessary. One of the biggest things that we experienced with our first adoption was that Reed kind of gained celebrity status. (OK, it was mostly my fault, but still …) Not all adoptive parents are comfortable with their kiddos being in the spotlight. Help educate your teachers and staff that adoptive kids just want to be treated as normal kids.
• Normalcy is normal. Going along with the previous point, you will succeed in making families feel welcome when you can just treat them as normal. Many times well-meaning people will ask families "where is she from"? and while the question is genuine and shows interest, they really just want to be a family, even if they don\’t all have the same color skin.

Think of it  as a progression of your ministry:

Initially: Have information available about adoptiion, agency recommendations, information about countries.You may even host some adoption education classes.

In the Process: Partner with those adoptive families and support them. Offer your excitement, prayers, and any sort of support they need.

While the adoption is taking place: Organize meals, visit the new little one(s), welcome them into the ministry.

After the adoption: Ask if there is any way you can support the family. Not all families have immediate chemistry with their adopted child and may need additional support. If the family is functioning well, relaunch your thinking toward the family and treat them like any other family who is loved and welcomed into your church.