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Kids Ministry, Kids Ministry Curriculum, Leadership
April 8, 2019

6 Things Kids Leaders Should Know about Curriculum: Part 4

By Brian Dembowczyk

When people ask me what I do for a living, I tell them that I help produce Bible study curriculum. But, of course, it is so much more than the way I feed my family—it is a passion and a privilege, one I seek to steward well. With that deep care for curriculum in mind, I want to share six things that I wish every kid’s leader knew about curriculum. Knowing these things, I believe, can transform a ministry, which more importantly, can transform lives.

So far we have covered:

  1. Every curriculum is crafted around a set of core values.  
  2. The goal is to teach the Bible, not the curriculum.
  3. There is no perfect curriculum.

Today …

  1. Teaching God’s Word takes work.

The points made on the last two posts require this one. Teaching the Bible is not easy, nor should it be really. It takes work. You can’t expect to put minimal effort into teaching and expect maximum impact. Saturday preparation doesn’t lead to the best Sunday execution. I realize that I may have just stepped on some toes here, but there is no way around this. Teaching others is too important—far too weighty—not to talk about this (see James 3:1). If you are a teacher, you need to be prepared to roll up your sleeves and invest time, energy, and effort into preparing to teach.

The best teaching comes from the overflow of our grappling with the text. We take the leader guide and hold it up next to the Scriptures and use it, with the Spirit’s guidance, to discern what God is saying in the text, what it meant to the author and original recipients, and how we are to understand it and live it out today in our context. None of that sounds easy because none of it is. It isn’t meant to be. It takes effort, which is what our God deserves, what our kids need, and what we are called on to do as teachers.

But this doesn’t mean that you get extra credit for working needlessly harder. The old adage certainly holds true: Work smarter, not harder. Here are a few tips to help you do that.

First, do some heavy lifting up front to help you in the long run. We talked about this in the first post, but to state it again, one thing you will want to do (perhaps need to do is more accurate) is take some time to understand the values of the curriculum you are using. What are you after? Again, to call on a popular adage: If you don’t know where you are going, how will you know when you get there?

Beyond that, familiarize yourself with the resource as much as you can. How is it designed? What is the logic and flow of a session? What other items and materials are available for you to use in a session (e.g. posters) and how do you access them? I talk to people all of the time who aren’t aware of the various items available to use each week as part of The Gospel Project for Kids. Know about all the tools that you can have available in your tool belt, why each exists, and how you can use them all.

Finally, know of the extra teaching helps provided for you. Many curriculums provide plenty of additional materials to help prepare leaders. The Gospel Project provides blog posts with additional resources, weekly teacher training videos, and more. These are all provided to help you as a teacher dive deeply into the Bible story so that you can teach each session the best as possible.

Questions for reflection

  • What is your normal rhythm of preparing each week? Are you investing well into your calling?
  • What additional resources are available to help you that you might not be taking advantage of?

Next time: The best teaching experiences include activities and group interaction.

Brian Dembowczyk is the managing editor for The Gospel Project. He served in local church ministry for over 16 years before coming to Lifeway. Brian earned an M.Div. from the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary and a D.Min. from the New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary. He and his family live in Murfreesboro, Tennessee.

Bible Study, Kids Ministry, Leadership
March 15, 2019

6 Things Kids Leaders Should Know about Curriculum: Part 3

By Brian Dembowczyk

When people ask me what I do for a living, I tell them that I help produce Bible study curriculum. But, of course, it is so much more than the way I feed my family—it is a passion and a privilege, one I seek to steward well. With that deep care for curriculum in mind, I want to share six things that I wish every kids leader knew about curriculum. Knowing these things, I believe, can transform a ministry, which more importantly, can transform lives.

So far we have covered:

  1. Every curriculum is crafted around a set of core values.
  2. The goal is to teach the Bible, not the curriculum.

Next up…

  1. There is no perfect curriculum.

Building off of the previous point, we need to recognize that the perfect curriculum simply does not exist. Nor can it exist. Every curriculum is produced by finite people. I tend to be a Type A kind of guy—a perfectionist in many ways. And this is a struggle for me. No matter how hard we try and how many eyes are placed on it, there has never been a single volume of curriculum printed without a typo. The amazing thing is that they seem to jump off the page immediately as soon as we open our preview copies from the printer!

But there is one more nuance to flesh out here, the most important one. The perfect curriculum does not exist, cannot exist, but more than that, it should not exist. That might sound strange from a guy who works on producing curriculum and who is a Type A perfectionist, but hear me out. The reason that there should not be a perfect curriculum is because each church is unique, as is every group, as is every teacher, and as is every kid. While we share the same mandate to teach the same unchanging, uncompromising Scriptures, the unique context of each group demands that what is shared and how it is shared differs. That is why no curriculum can be, nor should be, plug-and-play. And that is why it is called a Leader Guide and not a Leader Mandate.

So if you are a leader, be patient and gracious with us when you come across a typo! Know that it pains us that it is there and our goal is to provide you with a resource free of all typos. But more than that, follow the Spirit’s guidance as you prepare as we addressed in the prior post. And be patient and gracious with us here too. That main idea or activity that doesn’t help you, might just be the most important one for the church down the street from you. Know that our goal is to get as close to the ideal curriculum for as many churches and groups as we can. We want to make preparing as easy as possible for you, which will take us to the next point covered in the next post.

Questions for reflection

  • What is unique about your context? What needs and opportunities should you be aware of as you lead your group?
  • What is unique about you as a leader? What strengths, weaknesses, and biases might you bring to your group as you lead that you need to be aware of?

Next time: Teaching God’s Word takes work.

Brian Dembowczyk is the managing editor for The Gospel Project. He served in local church ministry for over 16 years before coming to Lifeway. Brian earned an M.Div. from the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary and a D.Min. from the New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary. He and his family live in Murfreesboro, Tennessee.

Bible Study, Kids Ministry, Leadership
March 6, 2019

6 Things Kids Leaders Should Know about Curriculum: Part 2

By Brian Dembowczyk

When people ask me what I do for a living, I tell them that I help produce Bible study curriculum. But of course, it is so much more than the way I feed my family—it is a passion and a privilege, one I seek to steward well. With that deep care for curriculum in mind, I want to share six things that I wish every kids leader knew about curriculum. Knowing these things, I believe, can transform a ministry, which more importantly, can transform lives.

So far we have covered:

  1. Every curriculum is crafted around a set of core values.  

Next up…

  1. The goal is to teach the Bible, not the curriculum.

If this list were in the order of importance, this one might be at the top. If you are a teacher, your goal is not to teach the curriculum you use. I know that sounds odd, but it’s true. Curriculum is a tool to teach something else of far greater importance: the Bible.

Do you see how critical of a distinction this is? No curriculum is the inspired Word of God; only the Bible is. No curriculum is infallible; only the Bible is. No curriculum reveals God’s plan to redeem people to Himself through Christ Jesus; only the Bible does. Hear this clearly as coming from someone who helps produce curriculum: We don’t want anyone leaving a gathering saying how great the curriculum is; we want them leaving saying how great the Bible is, and even more so how great the Author of the Bible is.

Practically, this means that a teacher’s focus, from start to finish, must fall squarely on the Scriptures. If it is any good, the curriculum a teacher uses will be a great help for him or her to do this. But it is just that: a help.

My suggestion is that kids leaders begin preparing each week by reading the Scripture from the Bible, not the leader guide. And don’t just read the main text of the session—what is often called the focal passage. Many curriculums will provide a suggested background passage which gives fuller context. Read that at least. The goal should be to be conversant in the surrounding context of what you will be studying and sharing that week. And you will want to do this early in the week, allowing time for what you read to seep down deep into your mind and heart.

Then it is time to dive into the leader guide and see how the curriculum presents the Bible passage. If an important point you discovered in your reading of Scripture is not emphasized strongly enough or missing altogether in the curriculum, build that into what you plan on covering with your kids. You know your kids better than whoever developed your curriculum. Follow the Spirit’s leading as you prepare.   

Then, when you gather, be sure to have your Bible out and make it your goal to use it more than your leader guide. Your kids need to see you drawing deeply from the life-giving waters of God’s Word. Tangentially, this is why it is so critical that you encourage your kids to bring their Bibles too. The best Bible study does just that—studies the Bible, not a curriculum.

Questions for reflection

  • What habits and practices might you need to develop or strengthen as you prepare for and lead Bible study sessions?
  • Do your kids all have Bibles? Do you have a few Bibles on hand for guests or for when kids forget theirs? If not, how can that be addressed?

Next time: There is no perfect curriculum.

Brian Dembowczyk is the managing editor for The Gospel Project. He served in local church ministry for over 16 years before coming to Lifeway. Brian earned an M.Div. from the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary and a D.Min. from the New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary. He and his family live in Murfreesboro, Tennessee.

Bible Study, Kids Ministry, Leadership
February 6, 2019

6 Things Kids Leaders Should Know about Curriculum

By Brian Dembowczyk

When people ask me what I do for a living, I tell them that I help produce Bible study curriculum. But of course it is so much more than the way I feed my family—it is a passion and a privilege, one I seek to steward well. With that deep care for curriculum in mind, I want to share six things that I wish every kids leader knew about curriculum. Knowing these things, I believe, can transform a ministry, which more importantly, can transform lives.

First up…

#1 – Every curriculum is crafted around a set of core values.  

From time to time, kids ministry leaders who are launching a new curriculum ask me to come and train their teachers. Often, these kids leaders want me to use the time to explain how the curriculum works—to get into the nuts and bolts and logistics of how to actually use the resource. Of course, that makes sense; using a resource well matters. But there is a bigger question that often goes unanswered at trainings like that: Why the curriculum exists.

Every curriculum is crafted around a set of core values: beliefs and goals that drive its content. Knowing what these values are, and ensuring that they connect with your kids ministry and church, is critical. A properly executed curriculum with the wrong values will not be effective in your ministry. This is a leading reason we see some groups struggle. It’s not a matter of them using curriculum incorrectly, but rather them using the incorrect curriculum. Or, what might be more likely, they do not know the DNA of the curriculum to understand where it is taking them and the win for every group time.

For example, The Gospel Project’s core values are Story, Culture, and Mission. This curriculum seeks to help kids, students, and adults grasp the one story of Scripture—God’s plan to redeem people through Jesus—and for that story to transform them and compel them to step into the ongoing gospel story and play their role as missionaries in their context. These three values inform all The Gospel Project does from what passages are covered and what vocabulary is used to what application is encouraged. Understanding this gospel-centric approach is essential.

For example, a story that is covered in all ages of The Gospel Project is David’s sin with Bathsheba (2 Sam. 11). This is certainly a challenging story to cover for adults, and even more so for students and kids, and especially for preschoolers. So why include it? Why not skip it for a more “kid-friendly” story? The reason is rooted in the curriculum’s values. This session is important to The Gospel Project because it reminds us that David was not the perfect hero we should emulate. Yes, we can and should learn good things from David, but ultimately we need to see that David was a sinner in need of a Savior just like us. And David points us to that greater hero we should strive to emulate: Jesus. Furthermore, this story reminds us that no one is beyond God’s grace. David did terrible things, yet God’s grace was sufficient. In His mercy, God showered David with His love and forgiveness and God does that for us too. Knowing those goals, which are related to that resource’s values, is essential for leaders to teach that session. If they miss that, no matter how well they might execute the logistics of the session, they will miss its win.

Questions for reflection

  • What are the core values of your church and kids ministry?
  • What are the core values of the curriculum that you use?

Next time: The goal is to teach the Bible, not the curriculum.

Brian Dembowczyk is the managing editor for The Gospel Project. He served in local church ministry for over 16 years before coming to Lifeway. Brian earned an M.Div. from the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary and a D.Min. from the New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary. He and his family live in Murfreesboro, Tennessee.

Kids Ministry, Leadership
December 11, 2017

5 Lessons from the Bible

By Brian Dembowczyk

Lois and Eunice: How do leaders grow their teams?

Remembering your tears, I long to see you so that I may be filled with joy. I recall your sincere faith that first lived in your grandmother Lois and in your mother Eunice and now, I am convinced, is in you also. 2 Timothy 1:4-5

Timothy first being discipled by his mother and grandmother and then by Paul is one of the most riveting mentoring relationships in Scripture. It clearly shows us the win of family discipleship followed by the value of strategic ministry discipleship.

Beautiful, isn’t it? But here’s the problem: far too many of us view mentoring as icing on the cake instead of as a core part of our ministries. The tyranny of the urgent pushes mentoring to the margins as “wishful thinking” or “idealistic.” Who has time for that?!?!

While not many of us have extra time to spend mentoring, it is perhaps the one ministry activity that we cannot afford not to do. Raising up future leaders is that important. Right now there are leaders on your team who have the potential to step up as leaders, but they need to be mentored. At the same time, there are people in your church who may not be on your team now, but who also have leadership potential that needs to be developed. Not many things position a ministry for the long haul as mentoring does. That’s why it’s so important. You can build the best kids ministry around, but if you don’t raise up leaders to keep it going after you, you haven’t built it to last.

Here are five tips for developing and maintaining a mentoring culture in your ministry:

  • Be selective. This may feel completely wrong at first. We usually want to include everyone and treat everyone the same—fairly. But that’s the problem. The same is not fair because people are different. God has wired us differently and that’s a good thing. Not everyone has the same abilities, aptitude, skills, and interests. So it would be wrong to treat everyone the same way under the guise of fairness. When it comes to mentoring, look for people who you feel have the greatest leadership aptitude and then build into them. Sure this means that you will spend more time, energy, and resources on these people—and that may not feel “fair”—but remember, even Jesus had an inner circle who were treated differently from others.
  • Be realistic. Mentoring does take time. There is no way around that. You will have to carve out regular time—time you cannot spend on other ministry tasks. Mentoring isn’t always glamorous as well. It’s not always us pouring wisdom into willing sponges. Sometimes the people we mentor won’t listen. Sometimes they will do silly things. Mentoring can be challenging and frustrating at times. Know that going into it.
  • Have an intentional plan. Establish a mentoring plan—don’t wing it. Think about how long the mentoring will last, what you want to accomplish, how often you will meet, what you want to read together, what you want to discuss together, what you want that person to observe you doing and what you want to observe that person doing. Develop the plan ahead of time and share it with the person so she knows to what she is committing.
  • Gradually release. Just like in delegating, gradually increase the person’s responsibility in ministry. Give them opportunities to own more of the ministry—even if it is just for the short-term during the mentoring process. A big part of learning is doing.

Multiply the mentoring. When someone completed the mentoring process, consider whether he is able to mentor others—whether in a full-blown mentoring relationship like he just completed or a scaled-down version of more targeted mentoring. Make it a goal to mentor future mentors.

Brian Dembowczyk is the managing editor for The Gospel Project. He served in local church ministry for over 16 years before coming to Lifeway. Brian earned an M.Div. from the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary and a D.Min. from the New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary. He and his family live in Murfreesboro, Tennessee.

Kids Ministry, Leadership
November 20, 2017

5 Leadership Lessons from the Bible: Moses

By Brian Dembowczyk

Moses listened to his father-in-law and did everything he said. So Moses chose able men from all Israel and made them leaders over the people as commanders of thousands, hundreds, fifties, and tens. They judged the people at all times; they would bring the hard cases to Moses, but they would judge every minor case themselves. Exodus 18:24-26

I have to admit that I’m a lot like Moses. No, not because I have a great shepherd’s staff or grew up as a prince in Egypt, but because like him, I can tend to make the mistake of trying to do everything myself. There’s a good chance that you can relate too because this is a common trap into which leaders fall.

But let’s be clear about this—we are called “leaders” not “doers” for a reason. If we as leaders are doing everything ourselves, we are not only going to burn ourselves out, but we are also failing to give our teams the opportunity to grow and be used by God, and we are limiting the ministries our kids and parents experience.

That is what Jethro saw Moses doing, so thankfully, he called Moses out for it. Jethro told Moses it wasn’t right for him to do all the judging. It was wearing him out and slowing the people down. There were plenty of good men who could partner with Moses to judge the people’s disputes. So Jethro challenged Moses to use them—to delegate the work.  

We have to ask what Jethro would say to us if he saw how we ran our ministries. Would he give us the same advice—delegate more? Even if you are more of a collaborative leader, there is probably still more room for you to delegate. Here are five tips for delegating in a way that maximizes your team:

  1. Know what you need to do. Let’s just say this up front—while there are many tasks you can delegate and several that you should delegate, there are also some that you cannot delegate. There are going to be certain parts of your ministry that you simply cannot, and should not, pass to someone else. Start with making a list of these tasks. Know what you cannot give away and why.
  2. Make a stop doing list. Now go to the other end of the spectrum—the opposite of what you have to do. What tasks do you need to stop doing no matter what? We all have them. Some are big, others are small. Some we can delegate to others, some we will just have to let die. Think about the time and energy drainers in your schedule. Think about the tasks you do that show little to no benefit. Make a list of these and plan how and when you will stop each. You will probably need to repeat this regularly as tasks creep back into your schedule.
  3. Delegate the right tasks to the right people on your team. In between your list of what you have to do and what you need to stop doing lives a large number of tasks that you can give to others. But that doesn’t mean you necessarily should. Make a chart with all of the tasks and the skills and gifts needed for each on one side and your team members and their skills on gifts on the other side. Now look for the matches. A wise leader will delegate the right tasks to the right people and set them, and more importantly the ministry, up for success. Delegating the wrong task to the wrong people is a recipe for frustration and hindered ministry.
  4. Let other people own what you give them but don’t abandon them. If you’ve ever driven a stick-shift car, you know how important it is to learn how to balance the clutch and accelerator pedal. Pressing too hard on one or the other will cause your car to jerk and sputter. Making a smooth transition between the two is essential. The same is true of delegating. Don’t dump off the task immediately—give the person time to learn it. Coach them as you slowly release it to them. But at the same time, make sure you do that—release the task to them. Don’t pseudo-delegate. Give it over to your team member but let them know you are always available to them if they need you.
  5. Strive for redundancy. As you delegate tasks to your team members, be sure to think of the long-term. Seek to delegate each task to more than one team member to minimize ministry bottlenecks—where only one person knows how to do something—which can choke and even halt ministry. A good goal is for multiple team members to be able to do every task in your ministry. That maximizes your team’s effectiveness and also positions your ministry to flourish even as leaders take vacations, get sick, or leave your team.

Next time — Lois and Eunice: How do leaders grow their teams?

Brian Dembowczyk is the managing editor for The Gospel Project. He served in local church ministry for over 16 years before coming to Lifeway. Brian earned an M.Div. from the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary and a D.Min. from the New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary. He and his family live in Murfreesboro, Tennessee.

Bible Study, Kids Ministry, Leadership
September 27, 2017

5 Leadership Lessons from the Bible: Nehemiah

By Brian Dembowczyk

Nehemiah: How do leaders think?

After I arrived in Jerusalem and had been there three days, I got up at night and took a few men with me. I didn’t tell anyone what my God had laid on my heart to do for Jerusalem. The only animal I took was the one I was riding. Nehemiah 2:11-12

Nehemiah was the rare leader who was simultaneously a visionary and an organizer. Usually, leaders are one or the other. Visionaries tend to be so lofty and big picture in their thinking that they struggle with implementation and execution. At the same time, organizers tend to be so detail-oriented and grounded in their thinking that they struggle to dream.

For most leaders, the goal is to excel in one area and be competent in the other. But every once in awhile there are leaders who excels in both—like Nehemiah. I love how the Book of Nehemiah captures Nehemiah’s heart and how his vision and planning intertwined so tightly. We don’t just see a leader who had a vision for a rebuilt city, but he thought strategically, and organized the people to build portions of the wall by family, knowing that families will work with more conviction and effectiveness together.

Nehemiah looked at the task God had given him, pondered the solution, and motivated the people to work together even in the midst of opposition. That’s leadership! Here are five tips for thinking strategically in our ministries:  

  • Read leadership books. One of the best ways to learn to think like a leader is to read books written by leaders. There are many good leadership books written from a Christian perspective, but don’t limit yourself to those. There are fantastic leadership books that you can learn so much from, even if they are not written from a biblical worldview. Be discerning when you read these (as you should be with Christian leadership books too), but don’t be afraid to read a business best-seller just because it comes from a different worldview.
  • Guard time to dream and think. This may be a challenge, but it is worth it. Leading your ministry doesn’t always mean people have to always see you doing something. Being busy is not the same thing as being effective. One of the most effective things you can do is to guard time to dream, think, and pray. Nehemiah did. More importantly, Jesus did too. Schedule time on your calendar to get away by yourself as an appointment and keep it.
  • Set wise goals. Goals are an essential part of strategic thinking as a leader. Former Major League Baseball player Yogi Berra is credited as saying, “‘If you don’t know where you are going, you‘ll end up someplace else.” It’s a pretty humorous quip, but it is also saturated with truth. If you don’t set goals in your ministry, you won’t be able to guide and direct where you believe God wants you to go. So set goals, but be sure they are wise ones. Your goals should stretch you, your leaders, and your ministry, but they need to be realistic too.
  • Evaluate. Like dreaming, it is critical that leaders guard time to evaluate. While the frantic pace of ministry makes regular evaluation difficult, it is worth the time and effort. When something goes well in ministry, evaluate the reasons so you can replicate them. Also consider if the event could have even be better. Likewise, if something doesn’t go well, look for what went wrong and what can be improved for next time. Find wins in it too. Very rarely is a ministry event a total loss.
  • Include your leaders and leadership team. Don’t miss that Nehemiah took some others with him as he developed a plan. As you think, dream, and evaluate, involve others as much as you can. God has given you and your team different experiences, perspectives, and abilities for a reason. Inviting others to think strategically with you is good for you, your team, and your ministry.

Next time — Barnabas: How do leaders breathe life into their teams?

Brian Dembowczyk is the managing editor for The Gospel Project. He served in local church ministry for over 16 years before coming to Lifeway. Brian earned an M.Div. from the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary and a D.Min. from the New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary. He and his family live in Murfreesboro, Tennessee.

Encouragement, Kids Ministry, Leadership
August 18, 2017

5 Leadership Lessons from the Bible: Peter

By Brian Dembowczyk

How do leaders handle adversity?

Peter stood up with the Eleven, raised his voice, and proclaimed to them: “Fellow Jews and all you residents of Jerusalem, let me explain this to you and pay attention to my words.” Acts 2:14

So there was Peter at Pentecost—standing boldly before a large crowd of Jews telling them that they had killed the Messiah. What a difference 40 days had made. Or to be correct, what a difference the Holy Spirit makes! Was this the same Peter who denied Jesus three times during His arrest and trials? Afraid of a little girl’s accusations? Yet now He stood in the very city where the crowds had shouted, “Crucify Him!” and proclaimed that very Him—Jesus—to the people. No, this wasn’t the same Peter, because this was Peter empowered by the Holy Spirit.

Let’s not sugarcoat this though. Peter preached boldly under the very real possibility that he might be arrested and condemned to die. Remember that the leaders had just done that to Jesus shortly before this, so why would we think they would spare Peter from a similar fate? And yet Peter was undeterred by the adversity he faced. Now that’s leadership!

We’ve addressed opposition and failures before this, but adversity is a little different from those ideas. Adversity can certainly include opposition and failures, but it isn’t limited to them. In ministry we will experience adversity in different forms—shrinking budgets, losing leaders, even rain during an event. So what can we do when we experience adversity in our ministries? Here are five tips for when that happens:

  • Expect adversity. Especially if you are taking risks, as you should be as a leader. Adversity is going to happen, so brace yourself for it and plan for it as much as you can. For instance, you know that you will have leadership turnover—people will move, they will step down, they will leave your church. Planning for that adversity might mean always developing new leaders and a leadership pipeline to move new people into open slots on your team. Plan for adversity as much as you can and don’t allow it to frazzle you.
  • Never ever give up. Peter is a fantastic encouragement to us in this regard. As much as he messed up in the Gospels, he never gave up. He persevered. He handled adversity and kept plugging away. And that’s what you need to do as well. Don’t let adversity stop you from doing that which God has called you to do.
  • Get back up right away. This is connected to the last point but it is so critical it deserves its own point. Learn from this lesson we tell our kids when they are learning how to ride their bikes—when you fall, get right back up! Staying down opens a door to wallowing, self-pity, and despair. None of those are good for you, your leadership, or your ministry. You just learned your budget will be cut in half? Call your team together, grab your calculators, and figure out how you will make it work.
  • Read biographies. This is a good leadership tip in general, but it is especially helpful when it comes to handling adversity. Two reasons. First, reading about other people reminds you that adversity is not unique to you. We all experience it. Second, you don’t have to reinvent the wheel. Seeing how others handled adversity can give you ideas for how you can do the same.
  • Focus on what God has given you, not what you think He has withheld from you. I had to learn this lesson early in ministry when I found myself taking attendance by who was not there rather than who was there. I would find myself grumbling that more people weren’t at events, all the while missing the kids who were there! You plan an event and expect 100 to show but only 10 do? Don’t focus on the 90 in that moment—you can’t do anything for them right then anyway. But you can make a world of difference in the lives of the 10 who came. Focus on the gift God has given you.

Next time — Nehemiah: How do leaders think?

Brian Dembowczyk is the managing editor for The Gospel Project. He served in local church ministry for over 16 years before coming to Lifeway. Brian earned an M.Div. from the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary and a D.Min. from the New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary. He and his family live in Murfreesboro, Tennessee.

Kids Ministry, Leadership
July 28, 2017

5 Leadership Lessons from the Bible: David

By Brian Dembowczyk

David: How do leaders handle their failings?

For I am conscious of my rebellion, and my sin is always before me. Against you—​you alone—​I have sinned and done this evil in your sight. So you are right when you pass sentence; you are blameless when you judge. Psalm 51:3-4

We often think of David as one of the greatest heroes in the Bible. He was the young shepherd who defeated Goliath. He was the beloved king and ancestor of Jesus. He was the prolific writer of many of the Psalms.

But David was not perfect, of course. Actually, he was far from it—reminding us once again that everyone needs God’s gift of grace and that Jesus is the greatest and true hero.

David wrote Psalm 51 after Nathan the prophet confronted him about perhaps David’s most grievous sins—adultery with Bathsheba and murder of her husband, Uriah. David had done his best to hide these sins for about a year, but sin cannot be hidden from God. Trapped in his sin, David was broken. He confessed his sins to God and penned Psalm 51 as a prayer.

As leaders, we can learn much about how to handle our failings from David. While our failures may not be on the level as David’s, we will fail. We will sin. We will make mistakes. We will fail our leaders, our parents, our kids, and perhaps even our church. But what we do in those times will speak loudly about who we are, and more importantly about the gospel. Here are five tips to remember the next time you fail:

  • Confess your sin to God. Often what seems like it should go without saying is what needs to be said the most—like this. When your failure is born out of sin, confess that sin to God and rest in His grace, mercy, love, and forgiveness. If you are not right with God, your ministry will not flourish. So keep a short account of your sin with God.
  • Confess to others when needed. While all of our sin is ultimately against God, we often sin against others as well. Perhaps you weren’t quite honest with your pastor. Maybe you got angry at a parent or took credit for something one of your team members did. When you fail as a leader in times like this, confess your sin to God and the person you wronged. No one believes you are perfect, so don’t act like you are by never confessing failures to others. People need a kids leader they can trust—be one by being honest about your failures.
  • Learn from your failings. Treat every failure as an opportunity to learn. Wise, strong leaders learn more from their mistakes than their successes. If your failing was rooted in a sin, get underneath it and try to understand why you sinned in the first place. Why were you afraid to be honest? Why did you get mad? Pride? Perfectionism? Get to the root of the issue and let God work there. If the failing was more of a tactical issue, determine if you could have prevented the failure ahead of time or what you can change and do differently next time. This is a great place to invite others to help you evaluate.
  • Build relationships. Having quality relationships with your peers, leaders, parents, and kids is vital because relationship equity is so important when navigating failures. The more you love others, the more honest you will be with them as you deal with your failures. At the same time, the more others love you, the more they will be apt to forgive you and encourage you through them.
  • Ask at least two others to hold you accountable. Just as David needed Nathan to confront him, you need to give someone in your life permission to step in and say the hard things that need to be said. Seek two other people—ideally people who have a different view of you as a leader—and ask them to hold you accountable in your leadership and life.

Next time — Peter: How do leaders handle adversity?

Brian Dembowczyk is the managing editor for The Gospel Project. He served in local church ministry for over 16 years before coming to Lifeway. Brian earned an M.Div. from the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary and a D.Min. from the New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary. He and his family live in Murfreesboro, Tennessee.

Kids Ministry, Leadership
June 19, 2017

Leadership Lessons from the Bible: John the Baptist

By Brian Dembowczyk

How do leaders handle success?  

He who has the bride is the groom. But the groom’s friend, who stands by and listens for him, rejoices greatly at the groom’s voice. So this joy of mine is complete. He must increase, but I must decrease.” John 3:29-30

What is the first thing you think of when you read “John the Baptist?” Probably camel hair, locusts, and honey right? Most of us think of John as this rather odd guy in the wilderness, and we fail to grasp his importance. The last prophet before John was Malachi—400 years earlier! After 400 years of silence, John was quite a celebrity. Sure he had his quirks, but he was actually quite popular.

And then Jesus showed up and that all changed. Jesus immediately drew a following—many people turning from John to follow Him.

John’s loyal disciples struggled with this. They too were used to the attention and now it was gone. But how did John take it?

“He must increase, but I must decrease.”

John got it. He understood that God had given him a following for one reason—to point those people to Jesus.

John is a great example of humility, especially in times of success. John didn’t let his following go to his head, he remained humble and held his following with an open hand.

Can we be honest? Sometimes it is hard to stay humble in ministry. Sometimes we can let it all go to our heads and we can start celebrating ourselves instead of pointing people to Jesus. Sometimes, if we are honest, we live as if we must increase and He must decrease.

We don’t want that, of course. It can just happen that way at times. So what can we do to prevent that? Here are five tips for handling success in ministry.

  • Celebrate wins with your team. Being humble doesn’t mean ignoring wins in your ministry. When God gives your ministry a win, celebrate it with your team! God deserves the credit and your team deserves to celebrate what God did through them.
  • Make your leaders the heros. Kids ministry is certainly a team effort! Be sure to always focus on your team when celebrating wins. Make it a habit to always point to your team when someone praises something you did or something that happened in ministry. Keeping the focus on them is good for them and good for your heart.
  • Point people to God’s goodness. While it is important to point people to your team, it is more important to point them to God. Anything good that happens in your ministry is out of God’s kindness and goodness. Anything not so good that happens is under God’s sovereign control. No matter what happens, take people to God.
  • Don’t put a cap on your ministry’s potential. There is always a balance when it comes to looking at wins. A mistake in one direction is to be too critical and not celebrate wins. A mistake in the opposite direction is to think you have arrived. A healthy, humble ministry perspective is in between. Celebrate the wins, but never be content with what God has done or limit what He can do. Evaluate to find out what could have been even better and where your kids ministry goes from here.
  • Keep realistic expectations. While you always want to be pushing to see God work even more in your ministry, and while God is infinite, we have to be careful not to set unrealistic expectations for ourselves and our teams. Just because God blew your doors off at this summer’s VBS doesn’t mean He necessarily will do it next summer. Pray for it, plan for it, but set realistic, yet challenging, goals.

Next time — David: How do leaders handle their failings?

Brian Dembowczyk is the managing editor for The Gospel Project. He served in local church ministry for over 16 years before coming to Lifeway. Brian earned an M.Div. from the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary and a D.Min. from the New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary. He and his family live in Murfreesboro, Tennessee.

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