Our kids and families are exposed to so much brokenness in our world. As leaders, we often find ourselves in situations where we need to speak into hard circumstances that are happening in a child’s life or in the culture at large. While each situation is unique, here are a few tips for readiness for you and your team for those times you find yourself responding to a crisis or difficult tragedies.
- Be calm and model that calmness in your voice, facial expressions, and body language. Reinforce that this is a safe place for kids to process their emotions and feelings. Be aware that kids may be mentally and emotionally processing a situation differently.
- Be sensitive, knowing that some kids will be carrying heavier emotions than others. Be receptive and listen to kids who are struggling and have questions.
- Engage in conversations in small doses. A child’s capacity for staying in a difficult conversation is often shorter than an adult’s capacity. Look for signs of when a child is ready for the conversation to be over (such as shifting gazes, no longer responding, looking for a distraction) and allow the conversation to be short if needed.
- Let kids lead the conversation. Children often frame questions in ways to indicate they are ready to hear the information for which they are asking. Answer questions factually, honestly, and in an age-appropriate way. Be mindful that kids in different age groups and stages of learning will process information and emotions differently. If your group includes kids of multiple ages, have additional leaders on hand to lead activities while making yourself available for kids who need to talk and process.
- Allow kids to feel their emotions, but don’t process your emotions with them. It is okay to sympathize with kids but keep the focus and attention on the child rather than processing your own emotions.
- Maintain routine and structure. In situations kids can’t control, they thrive in regular habits. They do best when there is normalcy and consistency to their everyday rhythms. Help them identify what they can control and guide kids in regular expectations while they are under your supervision.
- Be honest. Admit when you don’t have all the answers, and lead kids towards trusting God’s character, not our circumstances.
- Help move kids toward purpose. Many kids will want to respond through action. Consider how to encourage kids by engaging them to be helpers in age-appropriate ways. Examples may include praying with and for those who are closest to the situation, writing cards, or engaging with the community.
- Be ready to pray with kids. In times of crisis or tragedy, consider making additional time and space in regular rhythms to pray with kids, and alongside kids—allowing them to pray and express their thoughts and pleas to God as well.
As we lead, may we prepare our hearts and minds to be ready when we are called on to respond in tragic situations with sensitivity, honesty, and humility—trusting in God’s character and leading kids to draw close to Him during heartbreak or confusion.