Today we take a brief look at the final love language, acts of service. Before we examine how acts of service impact our children, let’s think about ourselves, and how we demonstrate this gift. According to Gary Chapman and Ross Campbell, acts of service are both physically and emotionally demanding. If our lives become imbalanced our attitude toward service as well as everything else in life suffers. As parents, we not only serve our children, we serve our spouses. A second aspect to keep is mind is that parents, our “primary motivation is not to please them (our children).” Our chief purpose is to do what is best for them. Third, acts of service must be spoken in relation to the other four love languages. Fourth, our acts of service become models for our children. We set the example for our children to follow.
What is the purpose of acts of service? According to Chapman and Campbell, the purpose of acts of service is to guide our children to grow into mature adults who are able to give love to others through acts of service. What are some things children with the love language of acts of service can do?
- Bake cookies for friends or neighbors
- Clean the kitchen after dinner
- Work in the yard with parents
- Pick up their toys without being told
- Assist with washing and folding laundry
- Make cards or other gifts for people
- Pick up garbage
- Assist with cleaning up after an event at church or school
Children with the language of service have a “How can I help” attitude. Be careful not to take advantage of the children, but allow them to serve and speak their language. Also note, that children have a way of doing things that is not always the way we adults would do them. Allow the children freedom to learn and serve without criticizing.
“Parents whose children speak this primary love language learn that serving is loving. Serve your child—and others—and they will know you love them.”