What would I talk about if I had only one hour to talk with a group of parents? The dangers of failing to disciple their kids? Techniques, methods, and tools for home discipleship? Marriage? 

As important as each of those is, I wouldn’t hit on any of them if I had only one hour. Instead, here is what I would do. 

I would spend the first 55 minutes talking about loving God. 

You read that right. I would spend almost all of my time talking about loving God, without even mentioning parenting. Why? Because it is what God Himself focused on, in what is widely considered the most important home discipleship passage in the Bible: 

4 “Listen, Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. 5 Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength. 6 These words that I am giving you today are to be in your heart. 7 Repeat them to your children. Talk about them when you sit in your house and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 8 Bind them as a sign on your hand and let them be a symbol on your forehead. 9 Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your city gates. — Deuteronomy 6:4-9 (CSB)

This passage is six verses long. Half of them address the parents’ relationship with God without reference to kids. The prerequisite for home discipleship is that the parent recognizes the unique glory of God (v. 4), loves God fully (v. 5), and cherishes Scripture (v. 6). Without this, nothing else matters. A parent can have the greatest techniques, methods, tools, and be consistent from day one. But if love for God is not driving discipleship, it is not discipleship. It is information transfer. And that is not what we are after. The devil knows doctrine. Discipleship is helping someone else love God as we have come to love Him. This is why Jesus said that Deuteronomy 6:5 is the greatest commandment in Scripture (see Matthew 22:34-40). 

My goal, then, would be to draw the attention of every parent in that room to how amazing God is. Maybe some are newer to the faith and still coming to understand God’s glory. Maybe others have been Christians for decades and perhaps have become “too familiar” with God. I would want to help everyone, including me, take a step back and sit amazed in the presence of our holy God. To recall that the Creator knows us and loves us. That He slaughtered His own Son so that we might be forgiven of our sins. That in Christ, we are fully accepted by Him. That we will spend eternity worshiping, serving, and delighting in God. Like the church at Ephesus, I would want everyone to remember our first love (see Revelation 2:1-7). 

I would spend the last 5 minutes talking about home discipleship being a gift. 

Then, with our affections stirred anew for God, I would want to reposition home discipleship in those hearts and minds of the parents. While home discipleship is a responsibility, that is not how we should see it. It is a duty, but it is also a privilege. It’s a gift. 

Home discipleship is more simple than we make it out to be: it is a parent sharing what he or she loves with a child he or she loves. I would want the parents to grasp the simplicity and beauty of home discipleship. We don’t have to share the gospel with our kids, we get to. We get to point our kids to the greatest good, God, Himself. Sharing a love for sports, or movies, or foods, or hobbies, or anything else with our kids is great. None of these are seen as chores. But they all pale in comparison to sharing God with our kids. 

So when the clock rolls from 0:59 to 1:00, my hope would be that every parent leaves in awe of God and eager to talk with his or her kids about Him. Those other details are important, but they will all work out. If the parent is motivated. 

Brian Dembowczyk served in the local church ministry for over 16 years. Brian earned an M.Div. from the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary and a D.Min. from the New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary. He and his family live in Murfreesboro, Tennessee.

We have a lot of roles as dads.

Depending on your child, and depending on their age, you might find yourself as a coach, a tutor, or a counselor. You might be a career coach, a protector, or a driving instructor. And on many days, you will find yourself doing all of the above and more. This is who we are. This is what God has called us to be. And all these roles fit under the great and glorious umbrella term of “dad.”

As Christian fathers, though, there is an even greater calling God has given to us – a calling that runs through all these individual roles. God has given us these children not only to protect, provide for, and teach – He has given us these children for us to be a shadow of their greater Father. I am, as their father, a visible portrait of an invisible reality. In other words, both when I do the right thing and when I come up short as a dad, I am but a shadow of who God is. By God’s grace, I pray that when my children encounter God they might say over and over again something like this: “He’s like Daddy, but better.”

• God loves me like Daddy does… only better.
• God provides for me like Daddy does… only better.
• God disciplines me like Daddy does… only better.
• God takes care of me like Daddy does… only better.

We are the first and most influential introduction our kids have to what “father” means – and we are meant to point their eyes upward through our character and interactions. This is indeed a high calling. It’s often an intimidating one. And it’s certainly one we fall short of on a regular basis. Yet we get up, day after day, bolstered by God’s grace, to try again.

Have you considered today how the way you speak to your children models God’s fatherhood? Have you thought today how your forgiveness models God’s fatherhood? Have you dwelled today on how your patience models God’s fatherhood? These are good questions to ask. These are good thoughts to keep in mind. But perhaps there is one other way—an even simpler way—to model God’s character in your home. It’s a way so simple it often goes overlooked.

Your steadiness as a father shows the steadiness of God to your family.

I love the many uses of “always” and “never” in the Bible as they describe the Lord:

• Lord, you do not withhold your compassion from me. Your constant love and truth will always guard me (Ps. 40:11).
• God is our refuge and strength, a helper who is always found in times of trouble (Ps. 46:1).
• Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you; he will never allow the righteous to be shaken (Ps. 55:22).
• Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you (Deut. 31:6).

The list could go on, but all these statements are meant to assure us of the steadiness of God. God is “always” and “never” a lot of things, and all of that steadiness ought to have a generally calming and peaceful effect on us as Christians. But as Christian fathers? It ought to do something in addition to that.

It ought to make us want to model that steadiness in our homes. Of course, you might look at this kind of steadiness and think it amounts to boredom. Maybe it does. But it also brings a sense of security and safety within our homes – that in many ways, our kids know what they get with us as fathers. We are the ones to be counted on, because we are the men who are solid and steady.

Men, there are moments to be “fun dad.” And there are moments to be “discipline dad.” But in all moments, there is the opportunity to be a steady father. Just as our heavenly Father is steady with us.

Michael Kelley lives in Nashville, Tenn., with his wife, Jana, and three children: Joshua, Andi, and Christian. He serves as the Sr. Vice President of Church Ministries for Lifeway Christian Resources. He is the author of Growing Down: Unlearning the Patterns of Adulthood that Keep Us from Jesus, Wednesdays Were Pretty Normal: A Boy, Cancer, and God; Transformational Discipleship; and Boring: Finding an Extraordinary God in an Ordinary Life.

This post originally appeared on michaelkelley.co.